If The Conscience Remains Clear, You Have Said And Done What You Should

To be a good communicator, it is not enough to speak clearly. The person who is capable of assertiveness, respectfully but firmly, will enjoy a clear conscience. From a more honest and authentic heart.

Discover in this article how to achieve a clear conscience to live calmer and happier. You can achieve it!

The importance of assertiveness

To begin with, there is something that is curious. According to this study published in the journal Sage Journals,  only 18% of the population has a high score for assertiveness. The rest, more or less “survive” or choose to look, nod and shut up.

It is not necessary to fall in the extremes. You don’t have to be the classic person with no hair on the tongue, that nothing is silent and speaks everything. Nor is it healthy to dwell in the spheres of surrender, conformity and silence.

We need, above all, to reach the pillow at night with a clear conscience. Knowing that our values ​​and our actions are in complete harmony. We suggest you reflect on it through these dimensions.

How to achieve a clear conscience

Eye to the data. According to Dr. Beverly D. Flaxington, 86% of the population seeks, above all else, to avoid conflict.

We try to live in that balance where we can be accepted. Where to accept some annoying behaviors or attitudes so as not to generate more problems. In order not to increase the psychological pressure or find ourselves, suddenly, with the rejection of others.

This type of behavior is common, both at the family level and at work. We put up with our father’s temper. The inaccurate words of our cousin. We put up with that co-worker talking bad behind our back from time to time.

Little by little we tolerate so many things that, almost without knowing how, a great mountain is formed. A threatening mountain that gives us back the reflection of who we are: someone who is silent and grants. Let’s see below how to manage these situations.

For a clear conscience: everything has a limit and it is in your dignity

It’s okay if we see that annoying cousin – and put up with it – only once a year. Nor will there be a problem if our father’s temper is punctual. If after a while, he realizes his actions and amends them appropriately.

• Now, if this and other behaviors are repeated and already affect our dignity and self-esteem, we must act.
• We all have a limit. There are those who will tolerate certain acts more and who will “jump” to the minimum.
• Don’t let your limit reach the line of pain, of destruction. If something bothers you, there is your barrier, the red button that you must press to act.

Be forceful and objective in what you do not want and it bothers you

It is not about doing harm. Nor do you need shouting or bad manners; however, you have to be clear and direct.

“I don’t like you talking behind my back. It is a lack of respect that I will not tolerate. What you do is not from mature or respectful people. Put an end to it and don’t spread falsehoods ”.

“I neither want nor can I do everything you ask of me. I will help you with whatever you need, but sometimes you abuse my trust without respecting me, without taking me into account ”.

• These are two simple examples of how we should act. Without attacking, with assertiveness and tranquility.

• Also, consider another aspect. How other people react to your words is not your responsibility.

If they take it badly or are offended, they must assume it. This will, in turn, demonstrate their degree of personal maturity.

Defending ourselves sometimes implies going against what we have been taught

Believe it or not, we live in a culture where those who defend their dignity are thought to be selfish. That telling the truth is being a reactionary, disrespectful.

You have to understand the context and the situation. However, it is clear that we are not always educated to defend ourselves, to love ourselves.

• Schools are not yet educated in emotional intelligence.
• At home, many of us assume the role of our parents. We learn that talking about our emotional needs is weak.
• That it is better to cry secretly, that “what hurts us is concealed so as not to hurt” others.

They are thought patterns that must be demolished as soon as possible.

• To live with a clear conscience you have to defend spaces, values, rights. There will always be a time when we must react against something or someone. There are many people accustomed to overpowering, to displaying their selfish arts.

We, for our part, have to learn to always act with respect, but defending limits. Do and say what you feel at all times, without attacking, but protecting yourself. No one can do it better than yourself. And you will have a clear conscience.

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